The Lancaster Journey: A life-changing weekend

Friday, May 17th started as a normal night, Bethany and Brock had their tee ball game.

Bethany was her sassy self

and Brock was the serious kid that once in a while would throw out a little quirkiness just to surprise you :)

After the game we stopped by Krispy Kreme to pick up donuts for Natalie in our small group. She had broken her arm :(

But on the way home that is where the normal Friday stopped along with my heart for just a little while. Bethany's preschool teacher called me a little before 11 to let me know that Bethany's classmate Kelsey and her grandfather where in a wreck, Mr. Lee (the grandfather) did not survive but Kelsey was in critical condition.

*****

That night I prayed all night and my heart just broke. I woke up the next morning to find out that Kelsey had also passed in the early morning. I lost it, I really did. As I called Bethany's teacher, Mrs. Hughes to let her know that Kelsey did not make it all we could do was cry on the phone.

The kids had their team pictures that day so I tried my best to keep it together. We went out to the field and I just prayed it would go quickly so I could get back in the van and cry.

It was hard to ask the kids to put on a smile when I could literally feel the pain the parents of Kelsey must have been going through.

Pictures went fast, the kids smiled

and goofed around

and eventually the pictures were taken

As the day went on I just did not want to do anything but lay in my bed and cry, I just could not get it together. I knew this was not healthy so I messaged my friend Emmy and told her how I was feeling and she told me something that was powerful.... she said "Amy, the burden you have is not healthy, God allows you to experience a burden for a time but when it becomes too much YOU have taken too much of a burden on and that is a sin" Wow, who would have thought caring too much could be a sin? But... she was right. The bible says in 1 Corinthians 10:13 No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.

Burden bearing is a gift and like the gifts of music, art etc., we have it naturally, before we know the Lord. The spirit leaps to burden bearing on its own. However, without the Lord, His understanding, and instruction, natural burden bearers can find life to be sad and heavy. Their own gift destroys their joy for life.
"My people perish for a tack of knowledge.
"Hosea 4:6 NAS

I had taken on a burden for the family of this precious little girl that I could not handle. Instead of crying out to God to help me with the pain that I felt I just stayed in that pain. Immediately I prayed that God would take this burden that was too much for me and it was like a bolder was picked up off my chest. I could breath, I could get up and I could talk without crying. I was able to talk to the kids about what happened and prepare them for what school would be like in the next couple days.

**** School Monday morning was tough, we went early and prayed with the staff in Bethany's classroom. Bethany cried a lot and because of my time with the Lord prior I was able to be strong for her. My baby girl sobbing is a sound I will never forget as long as I live. Her poor heart broke because she lost her friend.

The funeral was a few days later on a Thursday. Each person in Bethany's class wore a butterfly to remember their friend. Bethany was so well behaved at the funeral, I was so proud of her.

She sat with her classmates and we did not go upfront because we wanted to remember Kelsey just the way she was and not see the "shell" she left her when she went to heaven.

The next couple weeks were tough, Bethany broke down a few more times and pick up time was the worst. I caught myself waiting for Kelsey to come running with those bouncing curls and giving Bethany a huge hug while playing hide and seek as we were waiting for the boys to get out of school.

But God is good. 2 Corinthians 5 gives us hope that when we slip out of our earthly bodies we slip into a heavenly one and are present with the Lord. Bethany was sad her friend was not here with her but she said "It's ok momma, my papa, her papa, and Mrs. Hughes mommy (who passed a month before) are there waiting to swing and rock her" she did not doubt one bit that her friend was ok. So because of the faith of my child my faith was renewed. May 17th & 18th was a life changing weekend in so many ways but just as the word says, God works all things for good according to His will. That preschool class became closer, families became closer to God. It was no coincidence that a month before Kelsey and her grandfather took the class on a mule ride that was complete with rain and a large rainbow on the way back to the school.

Oh, and those pictures ......

Here's the end results (pretty handsome boy if I do say so myself)